CHANGES

At work I'm forever hearing that change is good. Sometimes it is, but most of the time I think that expression is used just to keep things on a positive level. A reminder that it will be good if you give it a chance and some time. That's not unfair, is it? So we all eagerly await for the positive results we're told are coming...in time:)

Change in our personal lives is the same way. Not always looked forward to eagerly, I think we try to convince ourselves that change, especially when we can't control it, is for the best. For one thing, we can't control everything that shapes our lives and well being because it's beyond our scope of control.

In July my Mom will have been gone a year. It doesn't seem possible. Most of the family has accepted her passing and keep her in our memories, but we have adjusted and continue on. My Dad has not. Just last night he broke down and said, "I can't let her go, Deb, I just can't." You see, my Dad lived for my Mom. As long as I can remember he placed her on a pedestal and during her last year of life he never left her side. He was truly devoted to Mom and making her happy.

The house has stayed the same. Other than cleaning out her closet nothing has been given away or moved. Dad spends his days sitting in the TV room, looking out the window at the beautiful landscaping in the back yard, barely eating or seeing to his own needs. He refuses to go anywhere, declines our invites to dinner. He's surrounded by pictures of him and Mom and the rest of the family, drowning in depression and a loss he can't live with.

Then three days ago I got a call from him, he needs my help. He's decided to move to North Carolina to live with my sister and her husband. The last thing I expected. He wants to sell everything that the rest of the family doesn't want and needs my help with pricing and later, the estate sale.

I brought him dinner last night and we sat and talked for hours. He realizes he needs a change and can't go on like he has been. Over the months he's received several invites to move in with people, even my ex-husband offered him a place to live, but Dad decided moving in with Lois was the best choice for everyone involved. My Dad is a smoker, he'll never give that up, and my sister and her husband smoke. No one else in the family does.

My sister is very happy and already building on an addition to her house so Dad can have his own place to be alone when the need arises. They're going to add lots of windows so Dad can sit and look out at the garden he'll create. That's the only hobby he has, he loves working outside.

I don't know how I feel about his decision. I know he needs to be around people, something to keep his mind busy. But not being able to visit with him whenever I want will be tough. The next few weeks will be spent cleaning out the house, selling stuff, seeing memories and familiar things go with strangers. It's going to be very hard on Dad and we all plan to be there to help him through it. To help us through it.

Since Lois and her husband are making a trip to Florida the the end of May to attend a wedding, Dad will go back with them, taking with him a little U-Haul filled with only what he needs.

A few memories to see him through the changes.

Summer Reading

I'm always amazed when I hear people talk about looking forward to long, endless hours in the sun spent reading. Lazy days, with nothing to do but turn the pages of a good book.

Huh?

Summer is the season I read the least. I struggle to squash reading into days filled with hiking, gardening, lawn mowing, rowing...ah, the list is endless! Summer? Long, empty hours? Not here.

Here, winter, with its howling winds and snowy days, is the time when I read the most. That's when hours stretch and I sit beside a roaring fire and lose myself between the pages of a good story. When darkness falls early but no one notices because we've all been cozied up inside all day long. My husband carves or reads beside me, and we sip tea and eat chocolate chip cookies. Yes, winter is definitely my best reading season.

So while I'm thrilled to see bluebirds in our birdhouses and buds on the daffodil stems, I'm a bit saddened to see my premier reading hours draw to a close. Between staking tomatoes, deadheading flowers and pottering in the greenhouse I'll manage to read but it won't be the same. I won't inhale books. Instead I'll read them in snatches, greedily devouring stories one stolen moment at a time.

Sounds like fun, doesn't it? Any time is a good time for a story if you're a book lover. But reading, like everything else, has its seasons. My dry spell is around the corner, but I'll still enjoy myself and I'm sure I'll get a bunch of great books read. Still, it will be a game I play, sqeezing a book in between an activity.

What about you? Do you have a time of year where you read more than others? Or are you one of those constant, even readers who's not really affected by the seasons? I'm curious, so please share.

Happy Friday!

Food, glorious food!

I was thinking about food and romance. How many relationships get into their stride over an intimate dinner for two? I thought about France, and how couples linger over their meal in romantic little restaurants and bistros. They take the table for the evening, there is no rush or push to eat and go, lovely!



Chefs are supposed to be the new sexy but I don't think I would feature one in one of my romantic novels, although I might have a lady chef. The male chefs seem to be so temperamental! A bit too "prima donnerish" for my taste.



Food in film comes across well, those cosy little scenes where the protaganists hold hands and raise their glasses to each other. However, for raw sexiness I think back to "The Adventures of Tom Jones," with our own Albert Finney (I always think of AF this way because he comes from Salford which is the city that sits side by side with Manchester my home town). Albert was young and so beautiful in that film, and there is a scene where he is sharing a meal with Joan Greenwood, a lady who has amorous intentions on the lad. It is wonderful, as they nibble and devour their food, taking long sips of ale in-between and you just know that pretty soon they are going to be tasting one another! Oops is that a too spicy image? I loved that scene. Must do for I can remember it now and it must be at least forty years ago!



Yes food and drink are the staples of the art world be it film or novel and think of all those lucscious painting of fruit, the sensual rounded apples, the succulent grapes. Mm...



Ta ta, Margaret.

Traveling

My daughter and I are planning a cruise for November, the first one in two years, and it got me to thinking about all the wonderful places we've been fortunate to visit so far. We found out a few years ago that cruising is the only way to go. We love it.

My daughter, niece and I were traveling buddies and we started out by taking a ten day cruise to Alaska. I say were, because they now have significant others in their lives. But that's okay, I love their significant others and since they make the girls happy, I'm happy. Anyway, as I was saying, we took a cruise to Alaska.

We crammed as much as we could into the land excursions which included dog sledding, a helicopter ride to a glacier, a go-cart ride into the wilderness and a train ride through the mountains. Coming from Florida we were prepared for the cold, and looked like Eskimos the day we flew to the glacier. That, however, turned out to be the only real cold day we had. Would you believe they were having unusually warm weather for that time of year?

Our adventure the next year took us on a two week cruise to Europe. We flew to Spain and boarded the cruise ship there. Our sights included Croatia, Italy, Greece, France and Rome. Some of my personal favorites were Santorini Island in Greece, where all the houses were stark white with brilliant blue roofs. I also loved Croatia. Wasn't too impressed with Athens, but the ruins were spectacular.

We did a wine tasting on Santorini Island. Took a gondola ride in Venice, the water taxis amused us there. Visited sites like the leaning tower of Pisa, Gothic churches in Spain, the Vatican, where my hubby's grandson is a Catholic priest. We went to the castle in Monaco and walked the nude beaches in France. Of course, we kept our clothes on! There were gypsies everywhere, dressed in old world garb that quickly identified them for who they were.

I literally walked a hole in a pair of new sneakers, purchased just for the trip. Everywhere we went were cobbled streets and stairs.

It was all very interesting, but I enjoyed Alaska more. Europe was for the girls. Our next planned cruise was to Ireland, only we didn't make it. My daughter found out she was pregnant and Alivia was due around the time we would have gone. Since then a lot of things have changed, all good. Our little family has grown.

I'm looking forward to our cruise in November. We're planning a week in the Carribbean. I don't even care if we get off the ship! LOL

Hunks, birds and things that hover

Yesterday I worked on my laptop, which does not have Internet connection, because the electric company was working on the lines outside our house. Now, before I go further, I should tell you that I intentionally don't have Internet access on my laptop. I use it to work, and enforce the work-only status by eliminating any temptation to surf the web, read blogs or send chatty emails. I like those activities way too much, so I make myself work by staying away from the Internet. Kind of like storing chocolate bars in the freezer. As long as they're out of reach, I don't touch them. But put 'em on the shelf and my fingers get itchy and my mouth waters waiting for a taste. Or two. Or three.

So there I was, slaving away on the lappie while those hard-hatted, handsome hunky men hovered in the treetops. Pulling heavy lengths of wire, shoulders and muscles straining, those guys really caught my eye. Really. Caught. My. Eye. Did I say I was captivated? Well, I was. Totally.

Let's just say it was hard to concentrate on conflict, goal and motivation when all I wanted to do was gaze out the window. My gaze kept straying...

Bird-watching--yeah, that's it. I was looking for, um, sparrows. Crows. Robins. Uh huh. Um... You don't buy that, do you? Good. I'd hate to think you were that gullible. I was watching the hunks outside! Yes, my eyeballs were peeled and I couldn't look away! And, all right, I'll admit this too--I enjoyed myself. There, I've said it. I had fun watching the guys working on the power lines.

Then I wondered what it was about certain professions--electric lineman in that scary-but-thrilling bucket thing being on the top of the list--that make even an ordinary male seem super hunky. What turns a "regular guy" into a superhero? Any ideas?

These hot, sexy men people romances, of course. But if we take a closer look we'll notice (at least I did but I could just be trying to purge myself of the memory of the hard-hat hottie!) that a lot of heroes aren't particularly extraordinary. Some are even guy-next-door types. Often these guys next door have "manly" professions, like construction worker, cowboy, mechanic...the list goes on and on.

Makes me wonder...do the professions make the hunk, or does the man make the profession more manly? And is this one of those great mysteries of life? Hmm...I wonder...

I couldn't help but smile when I read Margaret's post from yesterday about the professions not usually considered for heroes. How funny is that? Margaret and I were sharing a wavelength, sort of. I am so tickled by the thought I was even close to one of Margaret's wavelengths!

And she's right, of course, about choosing professions for heroes. It has never, ever occured to me to make one of mine a dentist, although I love my dentist. He's a darling man, kind and smart, funny and gentle and makes my teeth feel like a million bucks. I wonder... Do you think he'd consider getting one of those bucket thingies to hold the dental chair? And maybe, I don't know...maybe wear a hard hat while he works?

Have a great weekend!

The Professions

I was at the dentist the other day, it got me thinking...I don't believe I have ever come across a dentist as a romantic hero. Is it surprising, I mean who likes going to the dentist? It is no fun lying there with your mouth wide open while someone puts a lot of steel into it!

When I lived in the States, I had a dentist who was a real dream boat, he was so handsome but even he would not make it into any of my books!

Are there any other professions that don't get into romance? In the show Fraiser, Roz meets this dashing and handsome doctor, she really wants to date him until she finds out he is a gynecologist, even Rox can't stand the idea of where his hands have been all day!

I wonder if anyone has any other pet hates. I have tried to think hard but perhaps a funeral director would not make it, although in the film My Girl the girl's dad was a real sweetheart and that is what he did for a living.

Perhaps there are lots of dentists and gynecologists in novels, do let me know if you have come across them. Then I will really have to revise this point of view.

Margaret.

The Road Home

Sometimes finding the right home for my short stories takes years. I read lots of magazines and study writer's markets' online and in journals. But there is a lot of luck involved. Your story has to connect with the editor.

My story 'Dear One' was written five years ago when I lived in Connecticut. Last year I dusted it off and took it to my writer's group. My friend Maggie encouraged me to send it somewhere. At about the same time someone in the Short Fiction Mystery Yahoo Group mentioned the online journal, Breath and Shadow.

Chris Kuell, the acting editor, who gave me a contract for this story lives in Connecticut. Not just anywhere in Connecticut either, he lives in Danbury not far from where our house was. So I call this the story that truly went home. You can read the story at http://www.abilitymaine.org/breath/